Theo states the obvious, Drogba maintains character

We’ll start with the world-shattering news that Arsenal have officially confirmed the transfer of Arturo Lupoli to Fiorentina. Please control yourselves – it is a shame to lose Arsenal’s dreamiest player, but no-one’s bigger than the club. Remember, all.

Theo - Secretly plans to score 25 goals next seasonTheo Walcott has ‘warned’ fans not to expect him to replace Henry, as he’s ‘only 18’. Thanks for that, Theo, but most fans have been clamouring for a mystery signing as the replacement. Still, he’s putting pressure on himself, and his attitude is encouraging: ‘I want to get 10 goals next season and I would like to make 20 or 25 starts. Basically I want to improve every year.’ Which is only a good thing, tiger.

Speaking of Tigers (or lions), Eto’o’s price is being shunted down to £20m, according to The People. As hard as that is to believe, it is officially declared that spelling Eto’o’s name with a possesive apostrophe is quite entertaining. I’m sure it’s not bad to read, neither.

And then of course there’s Drogba. What’s to say about him that hasn’t been said already? He’s a churlish c-with-an-aunt, admits to diving, has god-awful hair and plays for the circus. And if that’s not childish, I dont know what is. Drogba reckons Arsenal are out of the title-race because replacing Henry is a difficult one to replace. Actually, we’re out of the title-race because we’re too cool to be bothered. Geeez.

More on Tevez: It’s apparently a two-horse race between us and Man Utd. A loan deal costing £9m? Now I’m sad. It looks less likely it’s going to happen, folks – even if Man U have spent a bucket load on ‘mind boggling potential’. That and Man City want to hijack our Anelka bid. If I were a betting man…

I’ve written a new feature: ‘The’ Season’s Prospects: Pre-Transfer Melange. Enjoy. And comment, for a change.

For now, that’s all. So long, my exclusive 4 readers who accidently graced this site when they were looking for Palates blogs instead. Get out…get out, now.

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